Nothing Good Happens After Midnight
by CommanderLavellan
Summary: OTP QUESTION THREE: Who in your OTP gets a call and or text at 3 in the morning asking their lover to pick them up from a bar because they're too drunk to drive? [Cassandra gets called to The Hanged Man at 3 in the morning to pick up a drunken Varric who was in a bar fight. AU.]


**Day ****3****: **Who in your OTP gets a call and or text at 3 in the morning asking their lover to pick them up from a bar because they're too drunk to drive?

* * *

I bent the rules a little with this one. It does end in a steamy kissing scene (at least I think so) so...they sorta become lovers? Or at least fuck buddies. I dunno. Just read lol Let is also be known that I do **not** hate Bianca, I just have a very strong disliking for her character after meeting her in Inquisition.

* * *

Cassandra groaned and rolled over in her bed, reaching for her phone on the nightstand. She pulled it, forgetting it was plugged into the charger and hissed when it slipped from her fingers. Too tired to care, she planted her face back in her pillow and shut her eyes. She heard her phone start to go off, covering her head with a pillow as an Irish pub song started to play.

"Mother..." Cassandra pushed the pillow off her head and leaned over her bed. She grabbed the phone as the music stopped playing and her notification tone went off. She unlocked her phone, squinting her eyes until she adjusted the brightness. She had gotten two texts from Varric and a call from him.

**[From: _Varric_]  
[yoooo~~~seeker, wazzup? I uhh...need a favor.]  
[Sent: 03:09am]**

**[Missed Call from _Varric_]**

**[Missed Call: 3:10]**

**[From: _Varric_]  
[Seeker...please, pick up.]  
[Sent: 03:11am]**

"Stupid dwarf." Cassandra sighed and laid her phone back on her nightstand, curling back under the covers. Her notification tone went off again, Cassandra purposefully ignoring it to return to her much needed sleep.

**[From:_ Varric_]  
[I'm going to continuously call you until you answer.]  
[Sent: 03:14am]**

And he did. The stupid Irish pub song continuously went off, only a second of silence before it started again. Cassandra shot up, picking up her phone.

"What?" She yelled.

"Jeez, Cass, what has your knickers in a twist?" Isabela laughed on the other side of the line.

"Isabela," Cassandra sighed, laying back down, "Please tell me he isn't—"

"He is. He's already gotten into a fist fight with Worthy, the poor bastard spit out a bloody tooth. I enjoyed it but I lost a couple customers 'cuz of him."

"I'll be there in twenty." Cassandra ended the call, letting arm fall next to her. "He's about to lose a damn tooth."

* * *

Cassandra stepped out of her car, locking it as she walked up to The Hanged Man. Isabela stepped out, amusement written on her face as she crossed her arms at Cassandra.

"Just tell me where he is." Cassandra scratched the back of her head through her hair, shoving her keys in her pocket with the other. Isabela smiled and motioned with her head for Cassandra to follow. Isabela opened the door for them, shutting and locking it behind Cassandra

"Seeker, what a _lovely_ surprise!" Varric raised his mug. Cassandra shook her head as she saw Varric's wounds, a gash across his broken nose, his lip cut with fresh blood still falling down the side of his mouth and his left eye swollen.

"You should have called Bethany." Cassandra walked over to Varric, annoyance radiating off of her.

"Yes, well," Varric cleared his throat, his words slurred, "Hawke told me never to call her while I'm drunk."

"Anders?"

"He's at Hawkes."

"Dorian?"

"Fuckin' Tiny."

"Lavellan?"

"With her family."

"Solas?"

"With Her Inquisitorialness and her family."

"Merrill?"

"On a date with Junior."

"At three in the morning?"

"It was a **really** good date."

Cassandra made a disgusted noise and took the mug from Varric as he brought it up to his lips. Cassandra glared down at the mug, bringing it up to her nose to smell. She quickly set the mug down on the bar, dry heaving while wrapping a hand around her throat. She hated alcohol, mostly the smell, taste, texture...**She **_**hate**__**s**_** alcohol.**

"The Green Fairy." Isabela informed her, moving behind the bar and pulling out the almost empty bottle of Absinthe.

"Wh...Why give this to him...in a mug?" Cassandra coughed, moving the mug away from Varric's hand as he tried to grab it.

"He kept complaining that the shot glasses were too small." Isabela shrugged.

Cassandra sighed, regaining her composure, and sat on a stool next to Varric, "What happened?"

"_Nothin_'," Varric shrugged, averting his eyes away from Cassandra. Cassandra raised an eyebrow and looked at Isabela.

"Bianca married whats-his-face today." Isabela leaned forward on the bar, resting her arms against it for support.

"Rivaini!" Varric whined, slumping his shoulders.

"I'm entitled to tell her what happened! I lost a good hundred sovereigns because of your stupid, though amusing, fight with Worthy." Isabela stuck her tongue out at Varric.

"Seriously?" Cassandra rolled her eyes, shaking her head, "I do not get why you are so heart broken about her, Varric. She's a _bitch_."

"Well so are you." Varric glared at her, his bottom lip pouted out.

"I do not deny that fact," Cassandra waved her hand and shrugged, "But I do not string men along, I accept them for who they are and what they do, I do not care if they are short, have horns, have a tiny waist or look just like me. I especially do not go for the richest men, either."

Varric let his head fall in his arms that laid on the bar.

"As much as I hate you with my _entire_ being, Varric, I respect you greatly." Cassandra leaned forward on her knee, "Stop pinning over her. She left and will cheat on whats-his-face as soon as another man with more money comes along. You could do so much better, though I doubt anyone will put up with your bullshit."

"Not like you do." Varric mumbled, sighing.

"Yes," Cassandra straightened her back, "I can not wait to see the day someone takes over my job of caring for you."

"You're getting paid to do this?" Isabela raised a pierced brow, her eyes moving between the two.

Varric groaned, "Yup. She picks me up when I'm drunk or in need of help and I pay her with sex."

"He's joking." Cassandra stood up, patting Varric on the back, "Come, you'll sleep at my place – Maker knows what drinks you have stashed away in your studio."

"She totally wants the **D**." Varric smirked, wiggling his eyebrows at Isabela. Isabela laughed as Cassandra slapped the back of Varric's head.

"Don't think I won't add more injuries, _snake_." Cassandra crossed her arms, a very faint blush blooming across her cheeks. She was grateful for the dim lighting of the bar. Varric hissed and rubbed the back of his head, "Can we at least stop by Hawke's and get Anders to heal me?"

"Not after those comments." Cassandra crossed her arms, glaring down at Varric as he slid off the stool. Varric grabbed onto Cassandra's arm, steadying himself. Isabela walked back over to the door and unlocked it as Cassandra and Varric started walking over.

"Take care, drive safe and I'll see you tomorrow, Varric." Isabela locked the door behind them. Cassandra helped Varric into the passengers seat and helped him put his seat belt on.

"W—Wait..." Varric grabbed Cassandra's arm as she was about to close the door, "I...I wanted to say...thanks."

Cassandra knelt down in between the car door and Varric, "You do not need to thank me, Varric. I do this out of the kindness of my heart."

"Bullshit." Varric smirked at her, chuckling.

"I wouldn't do this for anyone, and you know that." Cassandra flicked his nose, smirking as he hissed his pain.

"You wouldn't do _that_ for just anyone either." Varric waved her hand away, causing Cassandra to laugh. Varric sighed, shaking his head.

"I really am thankful...for you." Varric nodded, looking down at his hand that still held her arm firmly.

"I guess I can say the same for you." Cassandra sighed, shrugging.

"You wound me, Seeker." Varric pouted. Cassandra rolled her eyes, shaking her head, "Varric, I—"

In a split second Varric had his lips pressed against Cassandra's. Varric made his way into her mouth, his tongue gently moving across the soft flesh on the inside of her lips. Cassandra shivered, tasting some of the blood that had dried on his lip. Varric gently run his fingers through her hair, the other pulling her into the car with him and placing her on his lap. His tongue swept over her bottom lip, begging for entrance, at which she had complied, parting her lips to allow him in. She had released a soft moan against his lips as his tongue brushed against her own, her arms latched around his neck. Varric broke the kiss, smirking as he saw Cassandra flustered. She refused to look at Varric but the identical blush that staining her face said everything.

"I, uhh," Cassandra cleared he throat, placing a hand on Varric's chest, "I...need to get you home."

"I thought we were going back to your place?" A smug smirk forming on Varric's lips.

"Yes…my place." Cassandra quickly got off Varric, shutting the car door behind her. Cassandra shook her head and cursed under her breath as she walked around to the car. _Maker, what have I gotten myself into?_


End file.
